College Men Aren’t Closet Rapists
By Suzanne Venker
I don’t know which talking point from this administration is more insulting: the myth that discrimination keeps women from achieving parity with men, or the claim that male rapists lurk on every campus corner waiting to pounce on innocent, unsuspecting young women.
The latter assertion is particularly dangerous. Not only does it lack substance, it serves to broaden the chasm that already exists between women and men. A recent blog at the Guardian describes university life in the UK as “toxic” for women. There’s an “insidious” rape culture, writes Jinan Younis: a “world of sexual assault, objectification and harassment.”
This environment is purportedly widespread on our shores as well, despite the fact that very few articles cite any statistics to support the idea that campuses are rife with rape. To suggest such a thing is repugnant, for it paints men as evil and dangerous by nature – which they are not.
The only danger Americans need fear is the future of gender relations. Women continue to play games of one-upmanship with men, making it impossible for the sexes to find peace with one another. It’s bad enough the male-female ratio in our nation’s universities favors women. Now we must assume the minority of men that attend pose a threat to the majority?
Rape culture exists solely in the imagination of the feminist mind. Do we honestly believe young men have simply changed, that they were nicer and more respectful back in the day? And if they were, could it be because people developed actual relationships prior to jumping into bed? What a concept! Young people today don’t know even what dating means.
Rape is not an everyday occurrence in the lives of collegiates. What is an everyday occurrence is “hooking up” – which makes relationships, at the very least, confusing. Even worse is that its dangers are ignored. If President Obama wants to do something proactive, he could start by discussing the perils of this new sexual dynamic. The modern generation, of which his daughters are a part, has been taught by the culture that sex is meaningless. Combine that attitude with alcohol, and presto: disaster occurs.
Prior to the sexual revolution, men needed women’s permission to touch them sexually – that’s in part what made rape so clear. Today, women are as willing as men to participate in casual sex. And women who aren’t still engage in risky behaviors that compromise their ability to be clear about what they want – or don’t want – when the lights are off. Men aren’t mind readers.
That’s not to say some men aren’t cads, nor is it to say rape never happens. But it is to say most men aren’t rapists, or even potential rapists. It’s also to point out that women are just as capable as men of wrongdoing – they are not helpless victims. It may be true that there are fewer gentlemen amongst us. But it is equally true that there are far fewer ladies.
Rape isn’t rape because no one, save for the two people involved, has any idea who’s the victim and who’s the perpetrator. The real epidemic on campuses (and beyond) is that men are being falsely accused of acts they did not commit because folks like Obama assume men are to blame when a sex act goes awry.
He should sign an executive order that tends to that problem.